Life is full of actions and reactions. This is what makes up the world around us  – from the trees we see, to the relationships that we kindle and to the babies that come from them. Every single thing we do matters. When Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world,” the underlying simple assumption is that everything we do matters. When we explore the science behind the wisdom of his words, we recognize it helps the world, and also has a significant impact on our mental health.

The science is similar to understanding neuroplasticity. How we pay attention and what we pay attention to influences the way our brain grows throughout the lifespan. So if we have a continuous series of moments where we are paying attention to negative thoughts and worrying, so goes the brain. If we have a continuous series of moments where we are cultivating self-compassion, joy and curiosity in life, so goes the brain.

In the same way, we can have an impact not only on our mental well-being, those we encounter, and also on the world as a whole. You may not be a single force in solving a political crisis or reversing global warming, but everything you do matters. In order to better understand why everything we do matters, it’s important to understand how emotional contagion works:

In The Mindful Living Card Deck there’s a card that speaks to the science behind why everything you do matters, here’s a refresher:

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Want Relief? Spread it Out!

When it comes to the emotional challenges in life one of the first things our brain does is contract and makes us self-absorbed. This makes sense, since we have to focus on ourselves to fix our problems. However, it can have some unfortunate side effects, a critical one is that feeling disconnected and alone can cause further feelings of dis-ease. We start to re-balance when we’re feeling connected, and there are things we can do to correct this neural malfunction.

Rather than keep the pain inside, spread it out!

Whether the emotional suffering comes in the form of stress at work, frustration with our kids, or ambiguous anxiety that hits us when we least expect it, the bottom line is, in that moment the brain is disconnected, and operating mainly from its emotional center. It’s a painful mode of self-referencing that reinforces stories that continue to spiral the flavor of the mood that is fueling it. Continue Reading →

Noticing Good Can Chase Away the Winter Blues

As I was driving into my office today ruminating on a recent disappointing event, it struck me that I was caught up in small stuff that wasn’t really important. Small stuff left unchecked can contribute to a cycle of the winter blues. As my mind was caught up in the past, suddenly it awoke to notice the true beauty of winter trees in front of me! I suddenly felt awash in gratitude. We can train ourselves to notice moments and experiences that brighten our lives.

The way our mind perceives any given moment is through the lens of the past. It reaches back to our past experiences to make sense of the present and anticipate the future. The way we influence this automatic perception is by creating experiences in the present moment that get logged in short-term memory and then get referenced in future present moments.

As you look back on your day, ask yourself: where was the good today? No matter whether you were noticing good as it happened in the moment, or upon later reflection, your brain will log it into your short term memory. Continue Reading →

Feeling work stress? You’re not alone.

Prior to becoming a psychologist, I worked in the corporate world leading teams of people, and often felt overwhelmed and stressed. In the many years that I’ve been working in the field of mindfulness and psychotherapy, many people have shared similar experiences of overwhelming work stress.

In today’s business world, people are constantly being told there’s no time to “BE” and they don’t manage their time well, so it’s no wonder why many people are left feeling exhausted, unfocused, unproductive, unhealthy, and burned out.

“You need to manage your time better and learn to juggle more,” is the conventional reply to getting more things done faster.  Research from American Psychological Association indicates that the inability to focus for even 10 minutes on any one thing at a time may be costing you 20 to 40 percent in terms of efficiency and productivity.

What many business leaders are finding is that instead of doing more things faster, the key is to learn how to prioritize your attention, and do the most important things really well.

It may come as no surprise that Mindfulness can translate into a significant reduction in stress. When work stress is reduced, we can be more effective at our jobs. This is the reason companies like Google, Apple, Yahoo, Aetna and Continue Reading →

Everyday Compassion: We Can All Do a Little Every Day

Many of us have set a New Year’s intention to be more compassionate, but like the mainstream spread of mindfulness, it’s often something that’s more talked about than practiced.

Let this be the moment where we all dig deep from wherever we are to do small things every day to restore a sense of humanity in this world. What would the world be like if we all were more connected with the understanding that we’re all in this together? We all want to feel accepted, understood, cared about, that sense of belonging.

Allow this video to be a small moment of inspiration:

We can all do small things that are focused on daily giving. Here are 10 everyday compassion ideas, or use your own, mix it up it infuses novelty, creativity and fun:

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