On this page you will find articles, free audio and video, and other resources that may give you tips on working toward healing and growth. Whether you struggle with stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, or addictive behaviors, no matter the struggles you come here with, this is a place for you to get some tips to support you.
Tuesday, February 16, 2016 · 1 Comment
Life is a practice and what you choose to practice is what will make up your character. It’s worth considering what you value in life and then making an intention and plan to live alongside those values. This is the direct back to living Ghandi’s words, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
Consider how simple it really is:
If you want to be more grateful in life, practice being grateful.
If you want to be confident, practice confidence.
If you want to be more mindful, practice mindfulness.
If you want to be more loving, practice loving yourself and others.
If you want to be more forgiving and let go of stress-laden emotional burdens, practice forgiveness.
If you want to live essential happiness ingredients such as compassion and generosity, practice compassion and generosity.
With this said, no one said it’s going to be easy. We are all blessed with this negativity bias in our brains that has kept us alert enough to negative and fearful cues to survive this long as a species.
However, this negativity bias steps too far and infringes on us doing what we know inside is the direct path to happiness and well-being. It Continue Reading →
Tuesday, February 16, 2016 · 9 Comments
Life is full of actions and reactions. This is what makes up the world around us from the trees we see, to the relationships that are kindled and to the babies that come from them. Every single thing we do matters. When Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world,” underlying that was the simple assumption that everything we do matters. Now we know the science behind the wisdom of his words, and why it can not only help the world, but can have a significant impact on our mental health.
Part of understanding the science isn’t a whole lot different than the understanding of neuroplasticity. How we pay attention and what we pay attention to influences the way ourbrain grows throughout the lifespan. So if we have a continuous series of moments where we are paying attention to negative thoughts and worrying, so goes the brain. If we have a continuous series of moments where we are cultivating self-compassion, joy and curiosity in life, so goes the brain.
In the same way, we can have this impact not only on our mental health, but on the world as a whole. You may not be a single force in solving the Middle East conflict or in reversing global warming, but everything you do matters. In order to better understand why everything you do matters, it’s important to understand how emotional contagion works:
In The Now Effect you may have read about the science behind why everything you do matters,
Tuesday, February 9, 2016 · 6 Comments
I often say if there’s two things in life that we can’t evade aside from death and taxes, it’s stress and pain. Suffering is a part of life, but the mindset we layer over it makes all the difference.
I have so many examples in my life, and you may as well, where a difficult time was upon me and that very time was the seed which brought on the growth of the next moment.
The reality is, we never truly know whether an experience in life is good or bad because we don’t know what’s going to happen next.
In Uncovering Happiness I write about how the deepest, darkest moment of my life was exactly what inevitably opened my mind to seeking out support that led me to where I am today. It was this very experience, and many more like it, that led me to seek out mindfulness, which Continue Reading →
Friday, January 29, 2016 · 2 Comments
We all have difficult people in our lives, it’s part of the human experience. Typically, we tend to see them as a nuisance, someone I have to put up with, or even avoid. This also comes with it’s suffering. I’m not familiar with the author of the quote above, but the message is worth being curious about.
What if we could change our perception to seeing the difficult people in our lives as messengers or teachers that arouse something inside of us that needs to be cared for or loved?
If we do this, might we become less reactive toward ourselves and other people and inevitably won’t this give a chance for more relationships to improve? Might it be easier to let go of bitter grudges and move toward strengthening mindfulness, self-compassion and forgiveness? This isn’t Pollyana, it’s a practical approach that can help us focus more on what matters in life.
But consider this, if relationships improve, might that support communities, regions and countries to improve?
Is it possible to set off a spark in this way that leads to not only the healing of our being, but the healing of humanity?
Whoa, that’s a bit too large to swallow perhaps, so let’s just begin with today and ourselves.
Today, try this…
Thursday, January 21, 2016 · Leave a comment
Even though I have an awareness of my relationship to my smartphone, even though I take measures to limit my use, even though I have strong boundaries with my kids around their usage, if you asked me whether I feel like I have a handle on my relationship to it, I’d give you an unequivocal NO!
The more I talk to people about their relationship to their tech, the greater sense of belonging I feel. For most people, every time they see someone reach for their phone there’s a bell that goes off in the mind that creates an urge to grab their phone. Every time they’re slowing down or waiting anywhere, the idea or urge to check the phone arises. Like an addiction, I know this is unhealthy and yet with all my mindfulness and with all the techniques out there, I struggle with this too.
At last I’m finally understanding what this is all about and what to do about it.